Dwarf Race

The Derpen race (or herpa as they call themselves in their language) are a people that live under a blanket of arse, and are reknowned not just as shitty warriors, but also abysmal craftsmen, also they appear to be allergic to shit wiki's

prior to the War of the cheese toasty 10,000 years ago, the Derps were the undisputed masters of the arse, the collection of their potatoes being united under a High King, his potatoes being called by the surface dwellers as The Mash potatoe, controlling over a 1000 subterrainean potatoe farms, and with a population in the 5's, the mash potatoe was split up between 12 semi-autonomous cheese toasties, among whom a High toastie was elected, under the reign of the High toasties the mash potatoe was undoubtedly a clear rival to the great bum fluff, and was unquestionably the most retarded. But this changed with the War of the cheese toastie.

When the Daemon-Derp Amerok tore the barrier between the mortal Potatoe and Hell wide open, the Derps forged an alliance with beetroot and the cornish pasty in a effort to beat back the Deamonic Derp presence, and ultimately they didnt and died horribly cus theyre only potatoes etc, but not without a great cost to the heroic deamon derp, he broke a TOENAIL ;(

Derps like cheese toasties 

Ages

Age of the Ancients -50,000 years BCW (Before Chaos War): the Dwarves are seperated into many clans, fighting amongst themselves for survival and resources in the Underdark, it is here that the dwarf known as Endrin Stonehammer becomes a chieftain of one of these clans, and manages to unite the Dwarven race into a single nation, naming himself King, the next 300 years are spent carving out a vast kingdom for the dwarves to live in, and upon Endrins death he is proclaimed as a Paragon of the Dwarven people, the first to be named as such.

Rise of the Empire  -40,000 BCW to -30,000 BCW: the successors of Endrin Stonehammer continues his campaign, conquering more of the Underdark and bringing it into the growing Empire, until finally King Aeducan Stonehammer claims the title of High-King, upon the discovery of the Arkenstone, which he takes as a sign of his Divine Right to rule, upon his death his vast empire is split between his 12 sons (which is considered a miracle in itself) into semi-autonomous Kingdoms, all of them electing their youngest brother, Kharaz, as High-King. These Kingdoms would later take the names of the brothers.

The Golden Age  -30,000 BCW to 0 BCW: the Dwarven Empire would continue to expand its dominion over the course of its golden age, but it would largely remain a period of peace and prosperity, the different castes of dwarven society living in contentment with themselves as the Dwarven people grew rich from the vast seams of Gold, Silver, Mithiril, Diamonds, and other precious minerals, practically having a monopoly over the supply of most kinds of metal, however this wealth would lead to corruption, and in the last centuries of the Empires existance over 19 High-Kings would be found assasinated for political reasonings, thus depriving the Empire of strong leadership and leaving the Empire divided between warring factions when the Daemons came...

The Chaos War: At first the Dwarves were hesitant to join the alliance between the Elves and Humans, figuring that the Daemons wouldn't bother to look underground, but that changed when the Ork's broke free with Daemonic assistance, it was only after the fall of several Kingdoms that the Dwarves as a whole joined the new coalition, urged on by King Ungar of Kargas, and thus the Dwarven Empire would play a significant role in the war effort, providing much-needed manpower and technological assistance, but over the course of the war the dwarven capitol of Kal-Kharaz, and thus the Arkenstone, was lost, and when the last High-King died in the final battle against Ameroks daemonic legions, none of the surviving Dwarf Lords could lawfully proclaim themselves as the High-King, and thus the Empire came to a de facto end, although its successor state of Gundaar would continue to proclaim itself to be the true successors, through bloodline until its ruling dynasty faltered sometime in the 3rd millenium after the war.

The Dark Ages  0 ACW to present (10,000 ACW): for the past 10,000 years the remaining Dwarves have barely held their ground, despite constant campaigning the Ork menace plagues the survivors to this day, with only the Kingdoms of Gundaar and Karga remaining, the dwarven people number barely a million strong, and they are barely able to replace the losses they suffer every year from their constant war, which has led to a bitter saying among the dwarves "while the war has ended for the surface dwellers, we are STILL fighting it". However in the past 200 years, King Thorgrim III of Gundaar has been able to not just halt, but turn back the Ork onslaught, becoming the first King in a millenium to retake land that once belonged to the dwarven people.